This is Ursula's song, I believe is one of the greatest and most well-used villain songs in
animation. Ursula is a larger-than-life character who's not afraid to flaunt herself in this
wicked cunning song that starts out quite calmly and then goes over-the-top. In this sequence,
Ursula tries to trick Ariel into agreeing to a questionable contract, one that is designed to
trap her no matter what she does. It is interesting to note that in Disney's version of the
story, it is only at this moment that Ariel starts to realise just how much she'd have to give
up if she wants to be with Eric.
The following lyrics include the dialogue snippet that's in the soundtrack recording. The
movie, of course, has a longer exchange between Ursula and Ariel.
Ursula: The only way to get what you want is to become a human yourself.
Ariel: Can you do that?
Ursula: My dear, sweet child, that's what I do. It's what I live for. To help unfortunate merfolk like yourself. Poor souls with
no one else to turn to.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, the lonely and depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
Someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em across the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
Have we got a deal?
Ariel: If I become human, I'll never be with my father or sisters again.
Ursula:
That's right. But... you'll have your man. Life's full of tough choices, ain't it? Oh, and there is one more thing. We
haven't discussed the subject of payment. You can't get something for nothing, you know.
Ariel: But I don't have-
Ursula: What I'm asking is just token really, a trifle. You'll never miss it. What I want from you is... your voice.
Ariel: My voice?
Ursula: You got it sweetcakes. No more talking, singing - zip.
Ariel: But without my voice, how can I...?
Ursula:
You have your looks, your pretty face
And don't underestimate the importance of body language
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
Yes, on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
Come on
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On the lady who's withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue who gets her man
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet
You've to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul
Beluga, sevruga
Come winds of the Caspian sea
Larynxes, glossitis
Et max laryngitis
La voce to me
Now sing...
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
In its earlier draft stages, Ursula's song was longer, containing an additional set of verses
in the interlude when Ursula explains the "three days" agreement to Ariel. This verse is included
in the demo version that's saved for posterity in "The Music Behind the Magic" and the "Legacy
Collection" albums. Howard Ashman performed the role of Ursula in this track with such wonderful
relish and theatricality.
My dear, sweet child, that's what I live for. That's what I do. To help poor unfortunate merfolk like yourself.
Poor souls with no one else to turn to.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, the lonely and depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
Do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
That someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I've had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
Here's the deal. I'll make you a potion that'll turn you into a human for three days. Got that? Three days. Now
listen, this is important. Before the sun sets on the third day, you've got to get dear 'ol princey to fall in love
with you. Specifically, he's got to kiss you. Not just any kiss, a special kiss, the kiss of true love. And if he
does kiss you before the sun sets on the third day, you'll remain human permanently. If he doesn't, you turn back
into a mermaid, and you belong to me.
Now Ariel, don't be stupid, don't listen to her, she'll...
Have we got a deal?
If I become human, I'll never be with my father or sisters again.
That's right. But you'll have your man. Life's full of tough choices, isn't it?
Come on, I know you need a little magic
And magic is my specialty du jour
Don't just stand there looking sick
Would I kid you, play a trick?
Like I told you, I don't do that anymore
So I think you ought to take my little bargain
Yes, I think you ought to make my little deal
Sure it's hard to leave your life, but you could be a prince's wife
Why don't you let me take that dream and make it real
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Poor child, poor fish
Aren't you glad you brought your problem to a lady you can trust
Won't you let me grant your wish
You poor unfortunate soul
Poor sweet, poor dear
Aren't you lucky that I'm ready with a potion and a plan
Aren't you glad you came and asked if I could help you, and I can
When a mermaid comes to Ursula, she always gets her man
You poor unfortunate soul
Oh oh oh, I almost forgot. We haven't discussed the subject of payment. You know, you can't get something for nothing.
But I don't have any-
I'm not asking much. Just token really, a trifle. You'll never even miss it. What I want from you... is your voice.
My voice?
You got it sweetcakes. No more talking, singing - zip.
But without my voice, how can I...?
You have your looks, your pretty face
And don't underestimate the importance of body language
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
Yes, on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
Come on
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue, who gets her man
You poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet
You've to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
This is the Final Synth Mockup of Ursula's song, and can be found in the "Legacy Collection"
album. It's been polished up from the earlier demo and has dropped a few verses, plus it
features new synth music and reverb that really creates the atmosphere. Understandable why that
didn't make the final version, but I appreciate that it's been recorded for posterity, along
with Howard Ashman's delightful rendition of Ursula.
My dear, sweet child, that's what I do. That's what I life for. To help poor unfortunate merfolk like yourself.
Poor souls with no one else to turn to.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
Do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
That someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I've had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
That is the deal. I'll make you a potion that'll turn you into a human for three days. You got it? Three days. Now
listen, this is important. Before the sun sets on the third day, you've got to get dear 'ol princey to fall in love
with you. That is, he's got to kiss you, and not just any kiss, a special kiss, the kiss of true love. And if he
does kiss you before the sun sets on the third day, you'll remain human permanently. If he doesn't, you turn back
into a mermaid, and you belong to me.
Now Ariel, don't be stupid, don't listen to her, she'll...
Have we got a deal?
If I become human, I'll never be with my father or sisters again.
That's right. But you'll have your man. Oh, life's just full of tough choices, innit?
Come on, I know you need a little magic
And magic is my specialty du jour
Don't just stand there looking sick
Would I kid you, play a trick?
Like I told you, I don't do that anymore
So I think you ought to take my little bargain
Yes, I think you ought to make my little deal
Sure it's hard to leave your life, but you could be a prince's wife
Why don't you let me take that dream and make it real
Oh oh oh! I almost forgot. We haven't discussed the subject of payment. You can't get something for nothing, you know.
But I don't have any-
I'm not asking much. Just a token really, a trifle. You'll never even miss it. What I want from you, dear... is your voice.
My voice?
You got it, sweetcakes. No more talking, singing - zip.
But without my voice, how can I...?
You'll have your looks, your pretty face
And don't underestimate the importance of body language
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
Yes, on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
Come on
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue, who gets her man
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet
You've to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
Debbie Shapiro Gravitte performed her version of Ursula's song in her album "Part of Your World: Debbie
Shapiro Gravitte sings Alan Menken". This cover slows the song down tremendously and changes the key here
and there, turning it into a subdued but in its own way delicious vaudeville number that calls to mind a
diva performance under bright lights in a night club. Which is fitting, because Ursula sure does love them
spotlights.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, the lonely and depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And do I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
Someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue and gets her man
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate, unfortunate soul
It's sad, so sad, but true
You want to cross the bridge, my sweet
You've to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor, poor unfortunate soul
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
The musical review "Disney: On the Record" includes Ursula's song in its setlist,
and their version is a cheeky, upbeat, melodramatic rendition that would make Ursula herself
proud.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
You poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet
You've got to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
Go ahead, sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
You poor unfortunate soul
Beluga, sevruga
Come winds of the Caspian sea
Larynxes, glossitis
Et max laryngitis
La voce to me
Now sing...
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
While the other main songs of "The Little Mermaid" have been covered back to front by many artists,
"Poor Unfortunate Souls" hasn't, I suppose because it's a plot-driving song that's tricky to make stand
on its own. However, the Jonas Brothers managed to do their own pop rock take of Ursula's villain song,
changing the lyrics to give it completely new context. Kudos for effort! This version was originally
included in the 2-CD Special Edition re-release of the movie soundtrack.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me kinda strange
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a change
And I fortunately know a little secret
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed
Pathetic!
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
This one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to me, crying
"Will you help us, pretty please?"
And I help them? Yes, I do
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
Yes, on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On ladies who're withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue who gets her man
Poor unfortunate souls
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy person and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet
You've to pay the toll
Take a gulp, take a breath
Go ahead, sign the scroll
Nicky, Kevin, now I've got her, boys
The boss is on a roll
You poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
This one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to me, crying
"Will you help us, pretty please?"
And I help them? Yes, I do
Those poor unfortunate souls
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
The Karaoke Series album has a cover by Susan Lincoln, who's really hamming it up, maybe a bit too much.
Ursula: I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
Someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em across the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
Have we got a deal?
Ariel: If I become human, I'll never be with my father or sisters again.
Ursula:
But... you'll have your man. Life's full of tough choices, ain't it? Oh, and there is one more thing. We
haven't discussed the subject of payment.
Ariel: But I don't have-
Ursula: What I'm asking is just token really, a trifle. What I want from you is... your voice.
Ariel: But without my voice, how can I...?
Ursula:
You have your looks, your pretty face
And don't underestimate the importance of body language
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
Yes, on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
Come on
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On the lady who's withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue who gets her man
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet
You've to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul
The Broadway demo version of Ursula's villain song has almost the same lyrics,
but a surprisingly different feel, which is all in the delivery. Emily Skinner
presents a different sort of Ursula, and though she is just as conniving, she is not "seducing"
Ariel to the dark side with false promises. This Ursula corners Ariel into a box,
pressuring her to make an obviously ill decision at knife point.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, the lonely and depressed; pathetic
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And do I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
That someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
Ooh, here's a thought. What if I turn you into a human for three days. A trial run,
so to speak. But before the sun sets on the third day, you must get princey to fall
in love with you, i.e. give you the kiss of true love. *muah* If he does, then bingo,
you're home, you're his, you're happy ever after.
Ariel: And if he doesn't?
Ursula: Oh, I throw a little salt on your tail and gobble you up. (laughs) Or your daddy.
(laughs) I'm jesting, child, jesting. So do we have we got a deal, darling? Oh snap
my tentacle, one small thing. My fee.
Ariel: But I don't have anything-
Ursula: Oh, but you do. What about your voice?
Ariel: But if I give you my voice, how could I...?
Ursula: You have your looks, your pretty face
And don't underestimate the power of body language
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
Yes, on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
Come on then
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue who gets her man
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet
You have to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
Go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
You poor unfortunate soul
It's a standard contract. Look it over carefully. Not that carefully.
Ariel: But if I become human, I'll never see my father or my sisters again.
Ursula: True. But you'll have your man. Life's full of tough choices, ain't it?
Ariel: Give up my voice?
Ursula: Oh, do you want your princey-poo or not? Five four three two-
Ariel: Yes! Yes, I'll do it!
Ursula: Beluga, sevruga
Come winds of the Caspian sea
Larynxes, glossitis
Et max laryngitis
La voce to me
Now sing
Sing your voice over to me!
Sing and keep singing! Now swim for your life! Swim before you drown, human child! (laughs)
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
It's clear that the Broadway stage version of Ursula is not the same character that we saw in
the film. They've given her a makeover (kinda sorta), and Sherie Rene Scott is more glamorous and
cheeky, and less a frightening demon-witch. That's reflected in this song, which has more dramatic music
that make it a full-blown Broadway showstopper. It seems that Sherie Rene Scott has another thing in
common with Pat Carroll (the original Ursula) in that she's singing in a lower range than what she's used to.
Ursula: My dear sweet child, it's what I live for. To help unfortunate merfolk like yourself.
Poor souls with no one else to turn to.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed
Pathetic
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
That someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
Here's my best offer, babykins. I know a spell that will turn you into a human for three days.
Now it's a got procedural clause, sort of a squid pro quo. Before the sun sets on the third day, you've
got to get dear 'ol princey to kiss you. If you do, you'll stay human forever.
Ariel: And if I don't?
Ursula: Nothing drastic, darling, I'm sure. Oh look! Small print. Your soul is mine forever.
And you're doomed to spend eternity in my watery hell-soaked lair.
Lawyers, don't you just love 'em? Of course, there is one more thing. My fee.
Ariel: But I don't have anything-
Ursula: I'm not asking for much. Only... your voice.
Ariel: My voice? If I give away my voice, how do I...?
Ursula: You have your looks, your pretty face
And don't underestimate the power of body language
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
Yes, on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
Come on
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue who gets her man
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet
You got to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
Go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
You poor unfortunate soul
Beluga, sevruga
Come winds of the Caspian sea
Larynxes, glossitis
Et max laryngitis
La voce to me
Now sing! Sing your voice over to me! Sing and keep singing!
Now swim. Swim! Swim, swim for your life, human child!
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
"Descendants 2" features Uma, Ursula's daughter, so it's fitting that Uma gets to sing Ursula's famous
song, "Poor Unfortunate Souls". This version has been cleverly and almost naturally remixed in rap/hip-hop style,
with some cheeky vocals by China Anne McClain, who clearly relishes it. Sadly, the song itself doesn't appear in the
film but it is in the soundtrack album.
I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, the lonely and depressed
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
Someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
Yes, on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
They're not all that impressed with conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On the lady who's withdrawn
And she who holds her tongue who gets - come on, you!
Poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad (so sad) but true
If you want to cross the bridge
You got to pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and - come on, you!
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Come on, you!
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
Queen Latifah makes for a dramatic Ursula in the very theatrical take of her song in "The Little Mermaid Live!".
There's some changes in the song itself, with some delightful brand new verses that feel tailor-made for Queen
Latifah specifically, in how they would have not worked for movie!Ursula. That said, maybe to balance out the new
lyrics, one of the original verses is taken out close to the end.
Ursula: I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
To this
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
This one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help them? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
Someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em across the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
Now here's the deal, if you dare
There's a potion I'll prepare
Just consume and you'll be human
Three whole days up above
By the end of day three
Listen up, this is key
Just convince Mr. Prince
And get a kiss of true love
Ariel: If I do?
Ursula: Lucky you
You stay human through and through
You can go, wed your beau
It'd be totally divine
Ariel: And if not?
Ursula: Then guess what, girl
You turn back into a mergirl
Same as you were once were, girl
But that tail'll be mine
Don't be shy, dear
What will it be?
You want the guy, dear
Leave it to me
Ariel: But what about my father? And my family?
Ursula: Hmm, sorry, dear, there's no way to spin it
Life's full of tough choices, innit?
Once last thing, silly me
Did I mention there's a fee?
Nothing choice, just your voice
No more talking, singing, zip
Ariel: Not a word?
Ursula: Not a note
Not a whisper from your throat
Ariel: But-
Ursula: Show some spine
You'll be fine
Honey, here's a little tip
You have your looks, your pretty face
And don't underestimate the importance of body language
The men up there don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips is a bore
And on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
So sad, but true
If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet
You've to pay the toll
Take a gulp, take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
You poor unfortunate soul
Beluga, sevruga
Come winds of the Caspian sea
Larynxes, glossitis
Et max laryngitis
La voce to me
Now sing...
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
Melissa McCarthy takes on the role of the sea witch in the live-action movie adaptation, and she's a saucy one!
Her take on the classic iconic song hews closely to the vibe of the original, with good energy and some wicked
seduction, though sadly the song itself is truncated quite a bit. The loss of a few verses, and some of my fav
quickly-delivered lines in my opinion reduces build-up effect of song from slow to frantic, but on the flipside this
Ariel is presented as far more clear-headed when taking the deal. There's also a little adjustment to the spell at the
end there, considering the addition Ursula puts into it.
Ursula: I admit that in the past I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light and made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know a little magic
It's a talent that I always have possessed
And here lately, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, lonely and depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
This one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes, indeed
Those poor unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "spells, Ursula please!"
And I help 'em? Yes, I do
Now it's happened once or twice
Someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em across the coals
Yes, I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
So here's the deal. I'll whip up a little potion to make you human for three days. Got that? Three days. Before
the sun sets on the third day, you and princey must share a kiss, and not just any kiss. A kiss of true love. If you
do, you will remain human permanently. But if you don't, you'll turn back to a mermaid and you belong to me. We got
a deal?
Ariel: I don't know.
Ursula: Life's full of tough choices, ain't it.
Ariel: No, this is wrong, I can't do this.
Ursula: Fine then! Forget about the world above. Go back home to daddy. And never leave again.
Come on, you poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead, make your choice
I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day
It won't cost much, just your voice
You poor unfortunate soul
It's sad, but true
If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet
You've to pay the toll
Take a scale from off your tail
A drop of blood inside the bowl
Flotsam, Jetsam, now I've got her boys
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul
Beluga, sevruga
Come winds of the Caspian sea
Amnesia, glossitis
Et max laryngitis
La voce to me
Now sing...
This video was not uploaded by me. Feel free to let me know if the embed is not working.
